Dear friends,
It’s that time of year again, when many of us pause to contemplate and reflect on the year that’s gone by and in time, to look forward to the new year that’s to come.
To some who observe the religious festival of Christmas, this is a time for prayer and festivity. For others who do not observe the festival, this is as good a time as any to wind down for the year. Even as people say each day comes and goes the same way at the year end, as it does at the beginning of the year, you can’t deny that in the final week of December, there is always heightened sense of excitement and trepidation. Years are ticked off more significantly when you’re at school and heading into a new school year, and less so, when you’re an adult. But there’s still that residual feeling of anticipation of what’s to come.
For my part, this is as good a time as any to let you know that I’ll be taking a break from MWS to the new year, which isn’t very far away. I’ve faced a tumultuous and life-changing year in 2015, with that roller-coaster that I’ve been riding plunging from its peak, to finally come to a sudden, spine-juddering halt. It was almost as if someone had yanked the cable from the socket, and jammed a spanner in the works. In a way, that’s what happened. Even as I exit the cars on jelly legs, I feel like I’ve left my stomach and head somewhere else. This is me, and yet, it’s not quite the same me that went on that ride, anymore.
Like a school kid, I am facing a major change in the coming year that leaves me wanting to crawl into a hole and hide from the world, just so I don’t have to face the challenges to come. Yet, face them I must, for that is what we have to do to get on with our lives. But hide I will, for a few days, as the reality sinks in.
In the midst of the mind-numbing maelstrom of events that’s swirled around me, I’d like to just share a little story, of an incident that happened to me very recently, that has made me think a little more.
I’d gone to a shopping mall, and after picking up what needed picking, I discovered that I’d lost my parking ticket. I backtracked my steps, and hunted everywhere, but to no avail.
I also found out that it would cost me a RM60 fine to exit. I was resigned. It was my own fault after all, and it was due to my carelessness that I had to spend this unnecessary money.
When I went to the security counter to explain my situation, they were kind enough to ask if I’d checked everywhere, because it was expensive otherwise. I said I had. I even had the RM60 in my hand to pay the fine. However, out of the blue, one of the guards handed me a ticket. I handed him the RM60 but he waved it away. It was already prepaid, and all I had to do was take it and exit.
I wasn’t sure what to say, except thank you. It was an unexpected gesture, and although a small one, one that touched me. He did not have to do that, as I’m sure he knew, but he did it anyway. In his small way, he made my day better.
And in my way, I have and will continue to pay this forward.
It is easy to wound and hurt another in word or deed. It is much harder to give and bring joy and comfort instead.
I’ve been the recipient of wounds and hurtful deeds, and in reacting and lashing back out, I have caused my own wounds and hurt. I’d be a saint if I hadn’t. In the process, I’ve built up my walls and shielded myself from all potential hurt. But, when this happened to me, it made me realise that not everyone is out to get you. Sometimes, people who have absolutely nothing to gain from you, or who even know you, will help you anyway.
And I told myself that that’s what I should do. Don’t be a doormat or a walkover, but do what you can in your own little way to make someone else smile, even if just for a few minutes. It could be that break they need or are looking for. None of us know what others are going through, and sometimes, like in my situation, this was the wake-up call I needed to remind myself that it’s not just about me.
Sure, I think I’m the centre of my universe, and that whatever has happened has been the most severe of injustices; but really, it isn’t just about me at all. Sometimes, you just have to accept it and let it go. We can’t control how we feel about things that happen, but we can deal with it in a mature and rational manner, and we can all, in our little way bring a little smile to someone’s day. Perhaps, this change I’ll be facing will be a positive one. Perhaps, this will be my chance to do something different. Perhaps, not.
But I won’t know till I pull myself up by my bootstraps and get stuck in.
As 2015 draws to a close, and 2016 looms around the corner, take a moment to reflect on what you can do to bring a smile to someone else each day. We’re surrounded by too much negativity, stress and pressure. Let’s not let that define and mould us when we can be so much better and make things so much better for others around us 🙂
As always, I’m grateful and thankful for every single one of you reading this, and who has been reading my musings through the year. You have each helped me through my worst times, and given me the impetuous to go on, and I am always grateful. Thank you!
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year, friends 🙂
xoxo
Paris B
Tracy@BeautyReflections says
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year my friend! I loved this post and you are right. Facing our problems head on is the way to go-they rarely disappear, especially the bigger ones. I’m glad you’ll be pulling up your bootstraps! I’ll be cheering you on from the sidelines!
Have a nice break my friend! You deserve it! And I have the utter most with in you that next year will be better! Hugs and more hugs!
Paris B says
Thank you Tracy! I too am embracing your resolution to be brave this new year. Goodness knows, we need to be in these trying times! Hugs and hugs and I hope you have a fabulous year ahead as well!
Lily says
Merry Christmas PB and that’s a beautiful sharing. With all the negativity that’s been happening, big and small, it’s important to remember that kindness does exist, in many ways. I know some good people who focus so much on the bad that they’ve become bitter and harsh, in all their words and actions – and that’s very sad 🙁
I hope you’ll find your inner peace and strength and come out better after the challenges. I’ll be cheering with Tracy on the sidelines!
Paris B says
Thank you, Lily! I think it’s actually all too easy to get caught up with the bitterness. I know how that feels and honestly, I don’t really want to go back there again, because it really impacts on many areas of life – most of it bad. Thanks for the support, and here’s hoping I make it out to the other side! LOL 🙂
Renee / Blog for Beauty says
Sorry to hear what’s been going on Paris, and I pray that you’ll have a good 2016. Have a nice break and take care of yourself.
xx Renee
Paris B says
Thank you Renee, I’m hoping and praying the same too 🙂 Happy New Year!
Isabel says
Thank you for sharing Paris. I think it takes guts to wear your heart on a sleeve with contemplative posts like this especially to an audience that you’ve never met IRL for the most part.
Anyone can say or do things that hurt but I think that we ourselves wield an important weapon by having the choice whether to internalise hurtful things or to simply let them go. What others do is beyond our control but choosing how it affects us is within our own power to control. So even though getting hurt is a completely natural response, I will choose not to let it linger and have a hold on me. Whilst I will choose to embrace all the positive things that life has to offer. God knows we have to little of that already these days!
Wishing you the very best and a brighter looking year ahead! 🙂
Paris B says
Thank you so much Isabel. You are so right about our choices that we have and that we can make. I will definitely be taking your words to heart. Also, this is why I’m so glad I have a blog. While it’s not strictly a personal one, it allows me to just let my thoughts run a little and perhaps it could just help someone else out there too. Happy New Year!
Tubbs says
Have a wonderful Christmas and all the best for the New Year.
Paris B says
Thank you Tubbs, I hope you had a wonderful Christmas and I wish you the best for the coming year too!
Liz says
Thanks for this post! I like to think that the world revolves around me too (lol) and there’s so much negativity going around that I stayed put in my own protective bubble to hide away from the stress. Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to you too. One of my wishes is also for people to be kinder to one another, irrespective of race, religion or whatever makes each of us different.
Paris B says
Don’t we all Liz, don’t we all! 😀 There’s so much negativity in the world isn’t there? It’s nice to know that we have a safe place (here) where we can revel in pretty things 😉 Hope you had a good Christmas and a happy new year ahead!
Esme says
Merry Christmas! It’s important to lead a balanced life, not going to extremes (i.e. extreme pessimism or positivism). Kindness is such a forgotten virtue in today’s self-centered, narcissistic society, but it is a virtue worthwhile cultivating.
Paris B says
Thank you for the reminder Esme! You’re right, too much positivity is just toooo much! 😀 Happy New Year!
M.L. Chow says
It’s still not too late to wish Merry Christmas!
As I read this post, I reflected on the things going on in my life. This is a good time as any, for a change to our actions in the hope that a much better result will be yielded.
One thing that will not change is me looking forward to more of your postings. Really miss those #pbmademepacklunch postings on IG. Love looking at food!
Paris B says
Just as it’s never too late to wish you a Happy New Year! 😀 Thank you for your encouragement and support! Know that it’s very much appreciated, and I will strive to continue posting here. I love food too, and while I no longer do #pbmademepacklunch, I’ve started another thread! #pbeatslunch LOL! 😀
Skygazer says
Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Paris!
This does seem a good time to pause and contemplate on how our year has passed us. It does seem like you have had a really tumultuous year, and I hope the coming break gives you pause to feel a wee bit more settled. Sending positive thoughts your way!
Paris B says
Thank you sooo much Skygazer! It was a horrible horrible year, so I’m happy to leave it behind. Looking forward now to much better days ahead, with no more shadows looming over me! 😀
Santhi says
Happy holidays and happy new year to you. Isabel has said it so well. It takes guts to expose your pain and vulnerability in such a manner. Nevertheless hope the new year brings positive changes in the roller coaster ride of life. Cheering for you from the sidelines Paris along with Tracy and Lily.
Paris B says
Happy New Year Santhi! Thank you so much for all the support – know that I truly appreciate it from every one of you, who I don’t know, yet are so willing to throw in your lot with me <3
Cocoa says
I am glad you have made it through the year! Beautiful story with the parking ticket. He needn’t have bought that ticket for you but had been incredibly kind to do so. Excellent reminder that each one can make the world better with the little things we do. See how that kindness moves forward. He probably did not guess that you are a well-known blogger and would one day speak of the generosity. That in turn, spreads the goodwill forward.
Paris B says
Thank you Cocoa, for your kind words, and you know, I’m glad I made it through too, despite all the odds. I’m making it my personal mantra to pay kindness foward. There is so little consideration these days, that a small gesture goes a long way! Happy New Year!
Jayashini says
Thank You for sharing Paris. Wishing you all the very best. Have a great break
Happy Holidays n Happy New Year
Paris B says
Thank you Jayashini! Happy New Year to you too and I wish you a wonderful year ahead!
Ping says
I count my little blessings whenever I feel the negativity build up. I am so much more fortunate than many others. That keeps me going all the time. Be humble and move on. It’s the only way.
Take your well-deserved break and see you next year! It will be a blast! 🙂
xoxo
Paris B says
Hi Ping! You know, I don’t count my blessings enough but I really should! You are absolutely right. Here’s to a wonderful year ahead for us all 🙂
Reese says
Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays dear. Have a good break.
Paris B says
Happy New Year Reese! Wishing you lots of success in this coming year! 😀
Fiona says
That makes the two of us. I had a rough 2015. The roughest I’ve been of all the years I’ve lived. It may sound cliché to tell you to hang in there as I’m struggling myself and I often gave up. But the mind is a very powerful thing and I believe all it takes is the right positive mindset. You are not alone in this.
May you have a great 2016 ahead. Happy New Year! <3
Paris B says
Hugs to you Fiona and you know, 2015 was a pretty harsh year overall for me too. One of the worst by far, that’s for certain. On the bright side, it’s over and we can only look ahead. Thank you for sharing your struggles, and while we each have our different struggles, I’m glad we’re both hanging in there. Catch you around this year! Happy New Year <3
Fireangel says
Hugs ParisB.!
Here’s to a great 2016! <4
Paris B says
Hugs FA! Indeed, here’s to a fab 2016 and lots more angeltinis! 😉
Swati Murti says
hey Paris. it takes a lot to actually write about such things. wishing you a bright and glorious new year 🙂
Paris B says
Thank you Swati and I’m wishing you the best for this coming year too! 🙂
ML Chan says
<3
Paris B says
Thank you 🙂
DeLurking says
I will miss you! I think you have already been forwarding a lot of good karma with this blog, and I hope you get some more in return. Over the years that you have been writing, reading has given me a lot of help and joy. Wish you the very best with whatever you are putting your energy in to next!
Paris B says
Thank you so much for delurking! I will be around still (was just taking a short break till the new year), so I hope you won’t go away, and I’m very touched that you’ve enjoyed reading my blog, and for your well wishes. It is much appreciated and it’s what keeps me going on, day after day! Thank you and happy new year 🙂
Marina (Makeup4all) says
Thank you for such a personal post, I can relate to so many things you’ve said. Btw, 2016 will be a very hard year for me, too, and I want to hide as well… If only 😉
Paris B says
Ah Marina, if only we could burrow in a cave and be bears all winter! Pity life doesn’t work that way. I hope you have a wonderful 2016, all things considered! 🙂