You are beautiful, no matter what they say ~ Christina Aguilera
I came across a saying once that you can’t expect anyone else to love you unless you first love yourself.
There is a lot of truth to it. Often, we see our flaws far more clearly than we do our merits. It is so much easier to see a negative point, pick at it, blow it all out of proportion until it overshadows everything else positive. It is almost as if we love to wallow in self-pity. It doesn’t help when society has their set ideas on how you should look and behave.
Well, get out of it! 😛
Beauty is so much more than just proper application of makeup and good skincare. It is much more than having a pretty face. Beauty is to me, a package. It is reflected in your physical beauty but also in what you do, how you behave and how you react to situations. It is enhanced by what you use, that’s for certain and yet, how many of us have something we love about ourselves, yet never embrace or enhance it? How many of us downplay our strengths to conform to the general perception of beauty?
We think “Oh I have a big nose, not a cute button nose like Ms. Y” But do you then notice that what we have is also a great sunny smile? Or we think “I have so many acne scars and my skin isn’t porcelain smooth” but do we also realise that we may have a lovely head of hair and lovely delicate fingers?
We don’t do we?
I had this post in drafts for the longest time – 2 years. I never found the right way to approach it. But then, I saw Tine’s post and suddenly, it all fell into place so thank you Tine! 😀 Tine asked you what you loved about yourself. Well, I’m going to ask you something a little different. What do you find beautiful, that you love about yourself?
These are some of the things I told Tine that these were what I love about myself and they are also what I personally find beautiful about me – self praise you know, coz sometimes that’s the best praise of all HAHA! 😉
- Hair – My hair has natural volume so it holds most hairstyles well and I don’t have to do anything fancy to it. Just wash, dry and go. Yay! One less thing to maintain! Better still, short hair = win!
- Smile – A perfect stranger I met a little while ago sat across the table and told me I had a nice smile. It totally caught me off guard so I did the next best thing – smile bashfully 😀 Actually if I don’t smile, I look like I’m about to grind your bones and make me some bread (Jack and the Beanstalk anyone? 😛 ).
- Intuition – I have a more than healthy dose of intuition and perception. Sometimes its a blessing and sometimes its a curse but rarely am I proven wrong 😉 I like that because it means my ‘gut feel’ pushes me in the right direction so I get to the root of problems quicker and solve problems more quickly.
- Maps and some DIY – Yep, I’m really good at both. My brain is just wired that way 😀 I am not the artsy-crafty sort, but I can fix stuff around the house, build basic things, own a toolbox of proper tools and do a lot of guy-sy stuff.
- A cool head – Some might say too cool to the point of being detached. But I have shown more than once that I can keep my head in an emergency and have enough analytical skills to solve the problem because as with maps and DIY, I am a problem solver, intuitively.
These are 5 things I found about myself to love and embrace, that I have accepted about me. I’ve had my fair share of negative thoughts but realising that there are things about me that make me a unique package, which meant I did not have to conform to society’s norm, was the first step towards being happier and leading a happier life. Positivity, and a smile, is infectious 🙂
What do you love and/or find beautiful in yourself?
Recognizing something to love about yourself is the first step towards burying the negative thoughts and attracting the positive ones! So come on, share! 🙂
Paris B
Can I humbly add two more to your list? I LOVE your ability to rock a red lip and your way with words… you’re excellent with your posts! 😉
Aiyo your question very hard to answer leh cuz I’m awesome in every way! Wahahaha! Seriously though, for every thing people tell me they like about me, I can probably tell them 10 things that I don’t like about myself in return. I won’t blame my upbringing for this because my parents have always taught me to accept a compliment graciously (and to return one everytime), but its alot harder to practice in reality when you can be perceived as being arrogant if you do not do the compliment tango! Nowadays I’ve gotten better at accepting a compliment, but I still struggle to not add “but my butt is HUGE” to every compliment I get! With the exception of the husband of course, he only gets an “OF COURSE!!!” every time! Hahaha!! 😀
So to answer your question, I guess I like that I’m able to crack a joke at my own expense (but other people cannot say me hor, I’ll get mad 😛 ). Lol. I also like that I learn things and grasp concepts fairly quickly and easily. And my butt is huge. Kthxbye! Wakakaka! 😀
Ditto Jenn on the red lips and words (and relation to stories / characters! :))
By the way Jenn, I also have the “but my tummy is flabby!” or “LOOK at my wrinkles!” reaction when receive a compliment… just did the wrinkle thing yesterday… hahahaha
Aww Jenn you are too sweet, thank you! 🙂 And of course you are awesome – we all are 😀 Like you, I too still struggle with accepting compliments and I can see that when I say “Thank you” instead of “No lah, where got” the other person usually has this strange expression on their face. Its funny!
Aww, this post came very timely because lately, a lot of negative things has been happening to me and I am on my way to self pity. I’ve got to shake off the negative vibes. I love my nose and my hair because these are the physical attributes that I get most compliments. 🙂 Then, I’ve got a good sense of direction and I am also good at maps, I can easily go to one place even if I’ve never been there. I’m also good with numbers.
I’m sorry to hear of the negative things happening in your life, Issa. I do hope things start looking up for you soon and yes, focus on your positive points and it should get better. 🙂
Paris, what a lovely post! :]
You’re right, in the demands of daily life, it’s so easy to forget what’s beautiful about ourselves. I’m going to come up with five like you did. :] This is taking me a while to think, sadly.
1. Art- I love that I can draw and have an eye for depth in people (physically).
2. Lashes- They’re not super long but medium-long in my opinion (though people have told me I have long lashes) and they hold a curl well. I don’t wear mascara but just curl my lashes on a day to day basis.
3. Fingernails- They’re curved or arched and can grow quite long without breaking so I’m often asked if my nails are fake (when I have nail polish on).
4. Hair- I have lots of hair and my stylist had to layer it several times and even after she blew dry my hair, she said she needed to layer it once more. This is when I had really short hair. My hair also holds a curl very well. If I braid my hair when it’s wet, it lasts till I wet my hair again or comb it many many times with a boar brush.
5. My skin- I have been told by Ole Henriksen, himself, I had a porcelain complexion. That’s such a compliment haha. I do take care of my skin now that I’m educated about it.
6. Personality- (!! I came up with a 6th one.) I am a fairly happy person and many times, I’ve been told I brighten people’s days or make them happy just being around me.
Thanks, Paris, for letting me reflect on what’s good about me. I would have gawked at knowing I’d write something like this if future me told my past self.
Thank YOU Janessa for sharing your positive attributes! I like your #6 best – it must be a blessing having you in other people’s lives to spread sunshine whereber you go. Keep it up!
Hmm hmmm hmmmmmm… so I can’t say negative things about my flab or wrinkles…? oh darn it. Self criticism is indeed a virgo’s strength, you know. :p
Well, very quickly off my head, I “think” I have an ability to parallel process and getting things done quickly. I also have an ability with languages and software programs (not perfect, but enough to entertain people haha). Lastly, I have natural instinct of a mother. It’s strange because my mum never taught me how to be a mum. This instinct has taken even my husband (and myself!) a great surprise as he thought he was marrying a tom-boyish wife. hahaha :p
Erm what flab and wrinkles?! Nonsense! 😛 I think the secret mothering skill is wonderful. I guess we never know what we have in us till the situation arises 😀
Great post, Paris! Well said!
It’s taken awhile but I do appreciate my curly red hair, my porcelain skin (now that I’m older and no longer have acne issues), and my smile. I’m also good with languages — and end up being the one who talks when we travel in China or Korea, although hubby is the Asian one! And I’ve got clever hands that can draw and make origami things and sew; I will never get bored.
And I appreciate being older because nothing’s as big as it used to be. Age gives perspective and that’s a useful thing.
Porcelain skin! I’m jealous, Natasha! And being able to pick up languages is such a gift. I’m not very good at it myself so I am always impressed by people who are 😀
1. I love my dimple because it’s an ice breaker in many conversations. It also makes a smile that much sweeter *cringe*
2. I love my persistence (read: stubborn) because it lets me stay true to myself, despite difficulties
3. I love my sometimes hermit behaviour because I get to be on my own and recollect my thoughts and reflect. Many people can’t stand to be alone.
4. I love my perfect pitch ability because I can play a song just by listening to it once
5. I love my long fingers and nail because even though I keep my nails short, they still look long.
Thanks for this post. It came just at the right time when I’m bashing myself 🙂
Aww I’m jealous of your perfect pitch! I have a lousy ear for music haha! Was terrible at music classes 😛 I hope things are looking up at your end, Lily!
Thanks Paris for bringing this up, raising both hands to agree that we should indeed love ourself first before we could love others and love by others.
I used to see myself negatively (especially physically, if you ask me then, I’ll tell you i dun like my appearance top to toe :P) before the positive points….however, yes, however, i have started to look at myself positively.
Here you go how i think positively about myself…
– I have average height, long fingers, straight legs….overall, faring quite well with clothes, not perfect as yet but I’m happy to see myself now 😛
– Fast learner – I pick up things fairly quickly (apart from sense of directions) 🙂
– Intuitive – Love it & also hate it coz when I sense something not good, yet the sense is so accurate
– Pretty smile – I didn’t realise this until lately (as I mentioned before that I’m quite negative abt myself) there are ppl around me told me that my smile is sweet :D. Always smile from the heart not only brighthen up the days for ppl around me, most importantly it lead me to live happier! Bearing in mind that pretty smile can be from anyone regardless of our physical appearance!
– I can cook, I can bake, I can sew….simple one could just easily light up the life!
That’s all for now, yet there maybe some more awaiting discovery 🙂
Thank you for sharing, Jesz! See, it wasn’t so hard 🙂 Like you I too can tell you 101 things that’s wrong about me but struggle to find just 5. I think its important that we realise our positive attributes so we can find a way to get over our negative ones! 😀
Hi Paris,
Great post! Yes, I envy your thick short hair coz.. ok I better not start!
What I like about me?
1. I always find reasons to smile, even on my worst day. Many ppl told me I am a positive person and I make them happy so yeah. Good friend material *hihi*
2. I am a caring person to the point that a highschool friend call me her mom! Mommy material :p My girls are lucky!!
3. I love to cook and can whip up anything I can find in the fridge. Cook only, not bake ya. I don’t have the patient for baking. Measurement? What is that? haha
4. I am not too short, not too tall, not too skinny but not too fat too.
5. My eyes are gorgeous so they said. You be the judge :p
Ok I am done. Thank you for helping me appreciate myself more. Enjoy your day!
I love your #1 point – its a gift to make people around you happy! And #2 too – yes I’m sure your family is very lucky to have you! See, it wasn’t too hard to reflect on your positive side 😉
hmmmmmm this is still a tough one 😛
i can’t fix things around the house but they are thankful when i don’t break things.
i quite like my long fingers, although not much benefits there but who knows when there are money to grab, i can easily scoop more with my hands!
Hahaha! You need BIG hands to grab lots of money, Xin! 😉 Your long fingers is probably what makes you so crafty 😉
Hi Paris~
Been silently reading MWS for about a year and I have to say this is a great post and great timing! I’ve been getting digs from ‘friends’ and certain family members about my weight and am this close to developing a negative body image =/ But after reading this entry, I’m looking in the opposite direction now~
I love:
1) my eyes – I think they’re kinda pretty =P
2) that I’m a happy humorous bean – classmates & colleagues say I’m their kai xin guo(happy fruit?)
3) my health – strong as an ox, as my dad always says, thanks to mom & grandma’s herbal brews when growing up
4) that I’m more than capable of entertaining myself and really enjoy my alone time
That’s that I guess ^_^ wow it really makes a diff seeing it in text instead of just thinking it… Thanks for the post Paris!
Hi Rhi, thank you for reading and for your support and I’m glad to know you enjoyed this post 🙂 I like your #2 and #3 points. Being a happy person and making others happy is a gift, as is good health so keep it up! 😀 Don’t be a stranger 😉
I love that I am forever striving to be a better person. I love that I have gotten better with age- I like to keep things as simple as possible. I like to solve problems, and especially make things better for someone who is in pain or lonesome or frightened. Lastly, I like that my sense of humor is as keen as it ever was. Thanks for this post, Paris. xoxo Beth in Pgh 😉
I like your attributes Beth! A good sense of humour is terribly important. Life is seriously but we don’t have to take everything too seriously 😀
Awww, PB you’re more than awesome. Heh heh heh, really. ^.^
Thanks for the opportunity to toot our own horn!
1) I have a WAIST! But my torso is really really short so… heh heh
2) I can write – I really CANNOT imagine what I would do without my blog and writing my fanfics.
3) I can adapt to different people – I don’t have enough blessings to have a bunch of close friends through thick and thin, so I am forced to flit around certain groups. Luckily, I have two kindred souls in Uni, hehheh.
4) I can speak in dialects – Hokkien and a little bit of Teochew and Cantonese. It’s awesome being able to talk to my grandmas! (Although I speak Hokkien to my Teochew grandma) Most kids my age can only speak in Mandarin if they’re Chinese educated heh heh heh.
I’m glad you think so Hanny 😀 I share your short torso too which can make shopping for clothes quite a pain 😛 And adaptability is a gift – some of us don’t have that sort of skill 🙂
Hi Paris, this is such a nice thing for you to do for all of us! Yes, we do need to remind ourselves from time to time what is wonderful about ourselves. #1, 2, and #5 on your list apply to me as well. I used to like more things like being slim, super healthy and energetic but age does take away. But it also gives back so now what I like about myself is that I’m a good mother and I know that because my kids turned out great and they still like to hang around my husband and me. Also, I’ve always been curious and love to research and analyze and I am still able to do that quite well. Lastly, I have grown more tolerant and patient, certainly good qualities that I had too little of when I was younger.
Hi Kay, I’m happy you enjoyed this post 🙂 Often we get so caught up trying to better ourselves that we fail to appreciate what is it we are actually good at or already have 🙂 I loved reading about how your kids enjoy hanging around with you and your husband. In this day and age when kids seem to be drifting off into their own spaces, its nice to know that there are those who still enjoy being with their parents. It reminds me of my parents. We are a pretty close knit family and my siblings and I always joke that we never quite left our parents’ apron strings 😀
oh! i’m proud to say that i love myself! 😀
i love my hair, which is thick and dark and healthy 😀
i love my eyes which my parents gave me. i’m Happy to tell that they gave me big and round eyes which thick lashes, which i think i’m satisfied with it 😀
i love my pimple-less face, hahaha, will only have them during PMS or lack of sleep :X
i love the simply attitude that i have, always forgive others so i don’t need to hate others
i love my cheerful attitude! 😀
thanks for making me list them out, or i wouldn’t even think abt this and be so thanksful for it :X
Pimpleless face! I’m jealous! Thanks for sharing, Camy 😀
Hahaha love this post! Now it’s my turn 😉
You know about me loving my eyes already so I shan’t repeat that. There are two other things I love about myself:
1. My optimism. As much as I can, I prefer to see the brighter side of life. It takes a lot for me to really be angry at something or dislike a person. Annoyed, yes, but that blows over very quickly. I like to give the other person the benefit of the doubt. I don’t hold grudges but if I do, it usually means I’ve exhausted all of the brighter side I can find of that person.
2. I’d like to think I’m a very generous person :P. I’m not talking about money, but I guess I’m generous with my time. I do go out of my way to help if I can, even if there are financial costs to bear. It annoys people very close to me at times because they sometimes feel that other people do take advantage of me, but hey, if it doesn’t bother me, I really don’t mind at all. 🙂
Being generous with time is something not everyone has. Everyone is always caught up in the me me me so kudos to you! 😀
I actually sort of like myself. Not in a conceited way, but I guess I am just very accepting of my flaws and try to play up my good features. I like my big brown eyes.
You do have very pretty eyes, Marla 🙂 Its great to know you know yourself well 🙂
I love
1. My work. Allow me to travel and meet people from across the world. I learn new thing every single day. It is challenging and sometimes I am at lost what to do but I have great team to fall back.
2. My finger. They actually look nice to me I think.
3. I am skinny no matter what I eat. and that I am short and petite so people think I am young and adorable. Works for me every time.
4. People think I am happy all the time. Sometimes that may not be the case but I am grateful for the thought. I think therefore I am.
5. My siblings and parents. Sometimes they are annoying *pfft maybe all the time* but I wouldn’t be what I am without them.
#3 made me laugh 😀 Lucky you! Smaller statures definitely gives an impression of youth 😀 Thanks for sharing, Jue!
I love about myself:
1. My smile.
2. Being able to play the piano well, and I love the fact that I love doing it.
3. Being disciplined: it makes me do stuff (like go to the gym) when I don’t feel like it. But most importantly it obliges me to get up and get on with life when I’m feeling down.
4. Being able to eat a lot and staying in shape.
5. The fact that I am lucky to come from a multicultural background, and have lived in quite a few places. It really helps understand and appreciate different cultures, food, and ways of thinking basically.
Thanks for this lovely post. I was feeling a bit funny about myself today, so it really helps to realize how lucky I am.
#2 is such a wonderful gift, Sofia! I did learn to play the piano but I never really enjoyed it very much. Oh I love #5. I think you’re lucky to have had the experiences you’ve had – it helps you grow as a person. Thank you for sharing, Sofia!
This post came at a good time, when I’m down. But there always come a time when we hit rock bottom and just have to pick ourselves up!
What I find beautiful about myself:-
1. Hair – Thick, naturally straight, and not black, but very dark brown.
2. Skin – Fair and apple cheeks. Inheritance from my dear mum 🙂
3. Smile – My mum says I smile too much. Haha even to strangers.
4. Being in touch with my emotional side – Not sure if this is actually a positive trait. May get too emo at times. But it allows me to be a caring and nurturing person.
5. Positive – I take time to find my ground sometimes. But it usually makes me a stronger person at the end when I set myself to see things on the positive side.
Thank you for this post, Paris!
I’m glad the post helped you think about your positive attributes Charlene! I think they’re all wonderful traits to have so don’t let anyone tell you otherwise! Hope you’re feeling better now.
Beautiful post!
1. Being able to create, put my creativity and imagination on canvas.
2. Long lashes
3. Waist! Yeah 😀
4. Long lashes
5. Long, fast growing and healthy hair
6. Long, thin ‘you-should-be-pianist’ fingers
7. Big eyes in a colour which everyone describes differently.
8. Being a dreamer and very sensitive person.
9. Being a great listener.
10. Here I have problem, i dunno what to write more 😀 Let it be my collarbones, which are very pronounced and I like them this way 😛
#6 – and are you play the piano? 😀 I admire anyone with long fingers – they look so elegant and artistic as you’ve proven with #1. I love your description of yourself, Catherine!
No I dont play piano, unfortunately! I was only on one lesson then I lost my enthusiasm… I regret it today!
It’s never too late to pick it up! I had lessons but I was never good at it so I’ve forgotten most of it by now 😛