Why do women allow naked photos of themselves to be taken?

by Paris B on · 18 comments

in Discussions

Naked photos?

I’ve noticed something worrying in the local news scene where women are being blackmailed by their boyfriends or ex-boyfriends or ex-partners into paying them large sums of money or risk nude photos taken of the women being exposed.

I cannot help but wonder “Why do women allow nude photos to be taken of themselves in the first place?”

I’m referring here to compromising photos taken willingly, not of hidden cameras or photos secretly taken or photos taken under duress. I’m also not referring to the artistic style nude shots using models favoured by some photographers.

Sometimes, such photos of the naked women are taken using mobile phones or are downloaded onto laptops or computers and then when these gadgets are sent off for repair, they get leaked out pretty much like the Hong Kong artistes scandal last year. Or their partner then starts holding it against them, threatening to embarrass them through exposure.

I think as women we bear a responsibility for ourselves. We should not, in the heat of the moment, allow men or anyone to take incriminating photos or photos of yourself in compromising positions that may just land you in hot soup in the future. If you can feel embarrassment at your naked photos being exposed to the public then you should feel the same embarrassment when taking them in the first place.

Young girls especially who are impressionable should be taught not to remove their clothing at every opportunity lithe nubile young body or no. I’ve read about young girls doing it for the money or for some cheap thrill by stripping for web-cameras and putting their pictures online. Its dangerous and it can be demeaning.

Trust is a wonderful thing, but trust can be abused and if someone tells you to allow a naked photo to be taken to show you love them, I think its time to reexamine the ideas of love and trust. Just like with drugs, it should be ok to say no to taking naked photos… unless of course you are perfectly comfortable with the idea and with the threat of exposure.

I can’t claim to understand why this worrying trend prevails and I do not know if its happening elsewhere in the world, so please feel free to discuss or share your thoughts :)

Stay beautiful… and clothed!

Paris B

Previous post:

Next post:

[ 18 comments… read them below or join the discussion ]

Michelle June 9, 2009 at 10:38 am

I think it’s sad too. I’m thinking maybe because the bar has been raised for acts of rebellion. It used to be a lot easier to rebel ie. insists on moving out, insists on unconventional careers, insists on going clubbing in college, etc… but now even doing drugs seem to be norm… youngsters have to turn to extremes. Another thing is perhaps the trend of reality shows where that 5 minutes of fame is glorified (whatever it takes) and Facebook where people get desensitized about the lack of privacy. All in all… a disturbing trend because it’s truly becoming a norm.


ParisB June 9, 2009 at 1:08 pm

Hi Michelle

I do tend to agree with you about the reality tv shows and facebook that takes privacy and shoves it out the window. Might be why I’m not on there LOL…


Amelia June 9, 2009 at 11:21 am

I think it’s also due to the casualness of sex in culture now.
Young girls don’t have the mental taboo, most of us adults and older generation have, over sexuality and casual sex.

I guess girls are learning to respect themselves less.
If you have respect for yourself and know the responsibilities of sex especially pre-marital, i feel that you won’t be giving out or taking nude pictures of yourself?

It’s just my humble opinion >.<


ParisB June 9, 2009 at 1:09 pm

Hi Amelia

Thanks for your thoughts. Perhaps that might be true for the younger set. But what about the older set who still get caught in the trap? I don’t think anyone should be putting out nude pictures of themselves whether they are engaging in pre-marital sex or not. :)


Eli June 9, 2009 at 11:26 am

Oh, I know. My cousin was telling me about this case in her Labuan college where the girl’s ex sent her naked pictures to everyone’s handphones when she started dating someone else. The boy was kicked out of college, the girl was taken out because she was so embarrassed and they were both forced to marry to keep face. (Yeah, we are still kind of traditional there…)

Thing is, girls are dating at younger ages than we are and think that sex at 13 or getting naked is the norm because they don’t know any better. I am scared to have daughters.


ParisB June 9, 2009 at 1:10 pm

Hi Eli

That’s a sad story. 2 lives ruined because of them being foolhardy. Yeah I must agree that the thought of having daughters is a pretty scary thought!


rawzana June 9, 2009 at 12:04 pm

I personally think that those teens are not afraid of God. Most religions do not encourage or even ban pre-marital sex.

If their parents are strict and pious, it is doubtful that these teens would dare strip off their clothes at every opportunity.

This is my opinion. I am not an adult yet. I’m just sharing how I keep my chastity and my clothes on.


HaNNa_HuLLaBaLoo June 9, 2009 at 1:10 pm

Good for you, girl. *thumbs up*

I’m an adult, yet it still doesn’t change my belief in keeping up my virginity till I get married. Premarital sex is a big no-no, that’s what my belief tought me. Period. Simple and easy. So I just stick to that.


ParisB June 9, 2009 at 1:11 pm

Hi rawzana

Thanks for sharing your thoughts :) Sometimes though I wonder if some of these younger girls aren’t doing things they shouldn’t because they are rebelling against their strict upbringing? Not that I would have but it takes all kinds I guess.


rawzana June 10, 2009 at 3:01 pm

yes, it’s possible. they probably do it for attention.


yay hanna! keep your purity till you’re married.


HaNNa_HuLLaBaLoo June 9, 2009 at 1:02 pm

One thing that I can only think of is, they’re doing it without thinking of the long-term consequences. Btw, did u know that all deleted pictures/videos taken from any digital gadget, be it camera phone or webcam, CAN be traced back? Well I dont think these girls give a damn about this.

So please, even if you’re married and feel like getting frisky with your hubby, DO NOT record your sexual endeavor. That’s what mirrors are for.


ParisB June 9, 2009 at 1:12 pm

Hiya Hanna

Yeah, they do it in the heat of the moment and then fail to think about what happens after that. I LOLed at your last statement. I guess I’d have to agree to a degree! 😉


HaNNa_HuLLaBaLoo June 9, 2009 at 1:19 pm

LOL hell yeah if u can afford it, get a mirrored ceiling, right in your own bedroom! At least u dont have to be constantly paranoid of losing ur HPs. 😉

Indeed this issue is really serious, after reading this post I straight away though of my juniors, which the bf kinda feeling generous to share his “not-so-steamy” sex vids with my male coursemates. Apparently, those couple arent’ the ones with sex video. 0_0


a.min June 10, 2009 at 12:09 am

that is like slap on the face of the same generation people. often i can’t denied that youngsters today are far more thoughtless then people before. although i myself wasn’t one of them but i cant protest the idea, cause there are so many prove.
mostly the victims know there can be some kind of bad things happen with the photo/video,but out of the love they have for their boyfriend, they agree.so, just wanted to tell gals: don’t be so silly in love and give away all your sense!


beetrice June 10, 2009 at 11:53 am

The disturbing part about this is a common excuse heard after the fact is “I was in love”. There’s a difference between being ‘in love’ and ‘in lust’ (since we are talking compromising pictures here!)

But I’d also agree wtih the others that the younger generation has a “seen it all” jaded mentality..nothing shocks them anymore – how else can you explain vanessa hudgens taking nude pictures of herself for zac efron to “spice up their relationship”, at a mere 17/18yrs of age?? wtf??


lemon June 11, 2009 at 11:10 am

“Who has not been in love and acted silly” that was what Ah Q from Twins have to said during her recent came back. Her exuses were merely “too in love” with the Edison that she was scared that he will leave her if she does not allow him to take photos.

i think is just the excitement when being shot, like being so sexy, like film star or those attention seekers but then they have to realise the consequences later….should always think the worst case scenario….

I hv been educating my niece who is 9 yrs old now and now started to chat with her friends online, “do not let people take naked pictures of you!”. I think should teach them frm young…..



Alex September 25, 2009 at 3:19 am

I would allow myself to express a slightly different opinion, being a man (if I may…after all you should also be interested in learning how man think about those topics).

If the moment feels right, and girl/woman want TO ALLOW her nude picture to be taken by her boyfriend or husband, she should feel free to do so, keeping in mind that this little event might expose her privacy to the general public some time in the future. To MINIMIZE that chance as much as possible, woman has to condition her participation in this private “glamour” photo session by first taking nude pictures of the man. Two scenarios could happen: one, the man would not feel as comfortable about it and would drop the whole idea (I would guess about 30% of cases would end that way). Second, the man would say yes, and the woman would have his nude pictures as a “hostage”. Under that scenario this man would think twice before using her nudes against her, or just recklessly, because men usually are just as embarrassed as women about having their nudes all over the Net (this scenario I would say would take place in 10% of cases). Leaks could still happen, though. Third scenario is grim – man might insist on having the photo session his way. In that case maybe its the wrong man (about 60% of cases AT LEAST).


Adam January 22, 2010 at 3:43 am

I completely agree with the first response from Michelle. The proliferation of reality television has resulted in the need of many to completely divulge their lives, extending decorum far below the pre-internet boundaries. Facebook and reality television will destroy an entire generation. The kids who supposedly “matured” during the 00’s will grow up to become the biggest assholes in the history of the world…impatient, selfish and completely narcissistic.

My wife has been hell-bent on having children for the past few months…sometimes I wonder if a vasectomy might be better….


Let's Talk ~ Share your view

No SEO names, rude comments or advertising in comments. Please read the comment policy if new.

Share your latest blog post

Previous post:

Next post: